Monday, April 18, 2011

I love to hear your insight!

So today is going to be a more personal blog.....I need to hear your feedback on this- and share with others as I dont know what to do.

WHAT WOULD YOU DO?

Okay-

Do you think a person has the right to take away your rights?  (I know this alone doesn't make sense- so I will elaborate for you all)

The story-
Your  family backround isn't that great (you love your mother but she is mentally unstable- has been all your life). She has a bf (been with her for about 5yrs- he's a scum bag). Long story short one night he egged you on- to the point where you'd lose it on him- so there's a physical altercation- he chokes you, you hit him with a bat to get him to let go of you (though you barely can do that because you are light headed). Rest of your family is the same way as your mother and boyfriend.... Basically they have to be in the middle of something that is going on- look at me kind of thing.

So you decide to stay  away from all family members. 5yrs later you find out your mother is ill- I mean really ill! She's at the stage where nothing can be done- she leaves the hospital to live out the rest of her days (stage 4 cancer).

So even though things have been strained all your life you can't change the fact that you love your mother, always have.... When your grandmother says she wants you to visit your mother and mentions it to your mother--- first thing that's said is from the boyfriend "if he comes anywhere near here/her/us I'll call the police"!

So this goes back to the question at the beginning again.... Does someone have the right to take your right's away- your right to see your mother for the last time.

What would you do in this situation??  I am stumped on this!  I've known in all of 10yrs of being with my husband, that no matter what crap he's goes through with his mother and grandparents and sister- he loves them very much (he can't really hide that from me).

Please share this with others and leave your veiw or feedback, as I dont even know what to say to my own husband. I know we'll be going to the funeral- and I know it'll cause a commotion, which i dont really care about..but he has the right to see his mother... she's weak and just agree's with her boyfriend, has since the beginning...... it's sad though.

So far my hubby is doing okay- really holding it in though... As far as I am concerned he has the right to see his mother...but if she is agreeing with the boyfriend nothing can be done. It's not like we can sneak to her place, her bf will always be there sense he's on income assistance.

In advance thanks for reading my blog today and thanks for your feedback! I really need it at this time!!

I feel helpless

My next post will have some of my newer jewelry on it for yo uall <3 thank-you!

5 comments:

  1. ok i have feed back but will message you!

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  2. thanks! I'm fine with ppl putting their veiws on here- hopefully my hubby will look at my blog (maybe be a little mad at me at first) but then seeing what ppl say and the support, maybe will help him.

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  3. So Sorry about his Mom and The Cancer. My Mom had stage 3/4 when she found out. As for the right thing. Yes he has the right to see her, and yet if she won't see him or doesn't want to because of the boyfriend.... It is so tough to know what to say.Maybe he needs to reach out to another family member and discuss this with them. Families may fight and yell and scream at one another , but in the end they are family and they should have your back. If they don't I hate to say this to you... but You are his family and You love him and need to support his decision in the end. Even if it is not to see her.

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  4. Thanks Kath! That's how I see it- she's agreed with the bf and that's it, end of story. Nothing can be done. There's no contact with the famliy period, too many things have gone on in life and it was decided a while back that communications would be cut off (our decision). It was his grandmother that wanted him to go see his mother, then she called this morning to say she was sorry to tell him but....yada yada yada. I mentioned to him about writing a letter (I already knew his responce) but i think he's decided what he's going to do. he's going to cut off all communications with them all. In the end you are right, we are his family now- and I have to support him on this.

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  5. This is a very difficult situation..When it comes down to it, no one has the right to stop you from seeing anyone else....If he decides to see his mom and a great comotion ensues,does he want that memory be the last between him and his mom?......Sometimes the most difficult decision one makes is the best for both parties...He loves his mom and his mom loves him, nothing nor anybody can chnge that...He can mentally prepare to say his goodbyes now.....we are all family and will support him now.......She will be resurected in the future an they can rebuild a loving relationship then..

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